Sunday, May 13, 2012

Love to a trio of moms and my favorite prince

Happy Mother's Day to my shopping partner in crime and the sweetest Grammy I could possibly imagine.  (Seriously, look at the picture below.  I want to put her in my pocket so I can squeeze her throughout the day, everyday.)  Had a lovely weekend and have much to blog about, but Austin and I are absolutely exhausted from playing a game called BP on Saturday night and I am off to bed now.  More to come later...




Ma with her new iPad, courtesy of the good guy in green. Watch out Uncle Paul, your IT department is about to have a whole new dimension to it.


Will be dreaming of Prince Liam tonight, who would have turned eight today.  And sending my love to his mom today.


If you are in NYC next weekend, don't miss "Liam's Birthday Bash," a bake sale that promises to be like no other. Saturday, May 19, 11 a.m.-5 p.m., outside the Flatiron building (just North of 23rd Street, between Broadway and 5th).  Baked goods will be served up from an impressive list of bakeries.  You can make donations (big and small) here: http://cookiesforkidscancer.kintera.org/liamsbirthdaybash.

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Sorry, thanks, and Happy Birthday Jillian


I hope you’re not sick of the birthday posts, because one of my bests had her birthday this week.  The only bad part about being friends with Jillian is that a little part of me always knows that I don’t deserve her.  Jill is the friend you call when you wake up in the middle of the night at a fraternity house you shouldn’t be sleeping at (no names here…), the friend who takes the smallest closet/middle seat/last spot in line, the friend who never forgets to call or write.

When I see people who are so obviously flawed in one department or another—cheap, selfish, unreasonable—but who somehow seem to have no knowledge of said flaw, I sometimes get nervous.  I once tried to figure out what my flaw is that is obvious to the world but unknown to me, with my cousin, Sam, but we couldn’t figure it out.  She clearly thinks I’m perfect.  Love her.  Anyway, with Jill, I know I am so often the person on the other side of the table or the end of the line who I don’t like very much.  With Jill, I can be dramatic, irrational, and the world can be all about me and no, she hasn’t once walked away, turned up her music, hung up the phone.  (More than I can say about some of my other best friends, ahem, Carrie, who hang up on me simply for “speaking too slow.”)  Or, with Jill, I can just not say anything at all, and I know she’ll get it.

I once called Jill in the midst of a “personal crisis.”  When I heard her voicemail begin, I started debating in my head whether or not I should leave a message.  By the time the voicemail ended, I hadn’t quite decided so I stayed on the line for a moment, silent, and then hung up.  A few minutes later, Jill sent me a text.  She was at her boyfriend’s house for dinner, but was I okay.  Yes, just wanted to chat.  She wrote back, Are you sure?  Of course, I wasn't sure.  But I wrote, Yes, all good.  How Jill knew to call me that moment, I’ll never know, but I didn’t pause before launching into my sad song and dance.

Jillian, thank you for putting up with me.  And thank you for visiting this weekend with Ryan.  Austin and I officially voted you the best houseguests.  Austin almost keeled over when you guys rolled up the air mattress and folded the sheets.  And he enjoyed having a bud at the bar.  Next time, I promise that Liz is not choosing the rendezvous bar.  Liz, that bar closed at 11 p.m. on a Friday.  Oh, and you didn’t show up.  Nonetheless, your appearance at the second bar was much appreciated.  (You’re lucky your pretty.)

Happy belated Jillian. Love, love, love.

Monday, April 2, 2012

Happy Birthday my girls

Just wanted to say “Happy Birthday” to two of my favorite ladies.

Yesterday, one of my oldest friends—we went to the same elementary school—turned 24.   Caralina is one of a few (literally, a few) people from my high school who I still speak to.  You can guess what that says about me and/or my high school, but that is probably for another post.  Because now I want to celebrate my dear friend Caralina who was my friend when I wore Juicy Couture t-shirts; who listened to me as I went on about my first teenage crush and nodded in furious agreement that his girlfriend had absolutely nothing going for her; who covered for me when I got caught in a fib, or several; who did my makeup for every dance; who cheered me on through soccer games and track meets, with almost as much enthusiasm as my mom; who made lists with me of all the places we wanted to travel to and all the people we wanted to date; and who got just how annoying most everyone else around us was almost all the time (we were angels, of course).  Happy belated birthday, Linabina.  I am pining away to come visit you in Sweden this summer and to finally have those European adventures we dreamed up all those summers at Breezy.


Lina on the right with another bestie, her sister, Steph on the left--visiting Colgate during the summer of 2008.

Today, one of the greatest characters that I know also turned 24.  I met Vera at soccer preseason camp when we were both freshmen at Colgate.  Gosh, I was happy that she seemed to like me because she was the kind of girl that you just knew you had to be in with—hilarious, pretty, and somehow automatically popular.  Also, she called one girl in our class “social suicide” and I didn’t want that to be me.  Vera quickly became one of my best friends at Colgate.  She instilled in me a love of all words abbreviated (obvi, def) and she always knew just the right girl power song to play in every situation.  She was my favorite person to share large pizzas with except for the times when she doused the whole pie in salt.  She made me laugh everyday and when we went for a “crazy bus ride” in her Pathfinder, I really felt like I was living the best four years of my life at college.  She taught me loads about guys, like how you aren’t supposed to go out on a date with wet hair, and loads more about how to be a good friend, like never speak to a guy who has disrespected your friend and always have your girl’s back when she gets into an argument with another girl at a bar (especially when your friend is in the wrong).  Happy Birthday to a wingman and friend with no rival. Love ya, mean it.


My sista visited NYC this past weekend. Back in action. (Photo by Jamie Herrmann)

Sunday, April 1, 2012

My latest obsession and other distractions

For the past two weeks, I have been pretty much consumed by everything Hunger Games-related.  Of course, many people have been talking about the book series for years, and with a renewed vigor since the previews for the first movie started circulating.  When it got to the point that it seemed like everyone beside me had read (and loved the books)—including my friend, Liz, who probably hasn’t finished a book since the days of Dr. Seuss—I decided I needed to see what the buzz was about.  Liz says that I’m “alternative,” but I think I just have a natural skepticism to things that too many people like.  Still, you can only remain in the dark so long.

Two weeks ago, I bought the first book in the trilogy at a bookstore on the way to my Sunday afternoon soccer game in Brooklyn.  About 40 pages in, I was reading the book as I walked to the intersection on the lower west side where my carpool group was meeting.  I think I actually sighed when a friend from my team called my name and told me that the carpool spot had changed.  Now, I have to talk to her while I wait for the driver to show up.  Except I didn’t, I just kept reading.  I would have read during the car ride if it didn’t make me feel like I was going to throw up.  I took the subway home from the game, partially because the D train was running without a million diversions and transfers into Manhattan, but mostly because I can read on the subway without getting motion sickness.  I didn’t even try to be polite to the friend from my team who was also riding on the D back to Manhattan.  When she asked me about some television show, I told her that I don’t really watch television, which is actually true.  I think she understood my silence, though, because she had already read the trilogy.

I finished the first book that night, bought book two at the Barnes & Noble across from my office building the next day, and convinced one of my bosses to read my copy of book one.  I started book two and my boss bought book three the next day for us to share.  On Thursday morning, my boss emailed me to say she had finished book one.  I hadn’t finished book two yet because of a few conflicts that came up like soccer practice and Austin coming home from Vegas and wanting to tell me about his trip.   I did my best to act interested and surprised by the “madness” of Vegas, but it all seemed a little tame compared to District 12 and the arena (Hunger Game references).  Whatever.

So, obviously, I had to finish book two that day.  My boss needed it, right?  I decided to take book two into our weekly company meeting that morning, but it was only about 45 minutes that particular Thursday and I didn’t even get the full 45 minutes of reading time because I had to occasionally look up at people who were speaking.  However, I did finish book two at my desk after the meeting.  (No one from my office is reading this, right?)  I felt a little guilty about finishing the book at my desk, but I only had about 20 pages, which took me all of ten minutes to fly through.  When I confessed to my boss that I finished the book at my desk, she replied that she thought I was going to finish it at our company-wide meeting that morning.  Woops.  Apparently the agenda packet that I placed over the red hardcover wasn’t very good camouflage.

I didn’t get to finish book three last weekend because of a host of other happenings and some very important visitors: one of my very favorite people in this world, the southern beauty, Vera; our always entertaining friend, Ian; my adored younger cousin, Samantha Brown, who says I never blog about her, even though I do; my parents, who brought half of Costco with them; the infamous Grammy and her handsome sidekick, Grampy; and the one and only, RKSoPitted himself.

Last weekend kicked off with Steve (who went to Vegas with Austin, along with a few other guys) telling me the “real” story of Vegas, which you could say was a little different from Austin’s version.  Friday night then dissolved into a series of pitchers and Steve talking to a grandmother who somehow happened to find herself at a sports bar on the Upper East Side, alone.  Saturday began with brunch on the Upper West Side and a song that goes like this: “I like drinking with [insert name here] because he’s my best mate.  I like drinking with [insert same name] because he’ll down it in 8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1.”  After all the guys had chugged a couple of Bloody Marys and a few screwdrivers, the rest of the restaurant caught on and decided to play, too.  I’m sure the waiters loved us.

Our lovely group then proceeded to get kicked out of three bars.  The first, over a celery stick that one of our friends (who shall remain nameless) took off another party’s plate.  The second because the bar was feet from bar one and owned by the same company and the bouncer from bar one walkie-talkied the bouncer of bar two and told him not to let in the guy with the purple shirt or any of his friends.  So, maybe bar two doesn’t count.  And to be fair, the third bar we actually left on our own will because the bartender wouldn’t serve the guy in the purple shirt.  It was about 5 p.m.

At that point, RKSoPitted joined the crew and we all decided that we needed a change of scenery so we headed east.  I could tell that RK was dubious of how the night was going to turn out, but the change of scenery was just what everyone needed.  Until the kid in the purple shirt got kicked out of that bar a few hours later. At that point, our friends decided that it might be time for him to go home so a couple of them accompanied him after a pit stop at Tasti-D-Lite, of course, where it is rumored that said purple shirt guy bought two large ice creams.  I only saw one large cup in the video footage, but it is entirely possible that the first had already been devoured at the time of taping.

Anyways, last weekend was great but I had to stay up until 1 a.m. (late for me) on Monday to finish book three.  You probably guessed, but it was worth it.  I saw the movie with my boss this week.  (Yep, basically the best boss ever.)  The movie was entertaining and I thought the world of the book was well imagined.  Ultimately, though, it was kind of disappointing, which is so often the case with books that become movies.  My main gripe was that I wasn’t fond of the casting and portrayal of Peeta, who just wasn’t as charismatic on the screen as he was on the page for me.  (Or, as good looking.)

After the movie, it hit me that the trilogy was over for me.  I’ll never read it again for the first time, get to know the characters and their world without scenes from book three and images from the movie flashing before my eyes.  And it was such a thrilling rush to read for the first time.  The books weren’t perfect (albeit, of course, for me to tell Scholastic or Suzanne Collins how to edit their books), but they were page-turners in the best sense.  The pacing was masterful—the end of each chapter begs you start the next.  And I’d argue that the books were thoughtful and relevant.  (As if they need a positive recommendation from me to start selling.)

Because I’m such a nerd, I spent most of this weekend talking about the books.  I think I managed to bring them up in conversations with four different people at a party last night, three of who were strangers.  Most of the conversations went well except for the one when I started talking about the brown bag that I attended last week on dystopian literature (and the Hunger Games trilogy).  I think I lost/scared the guy I was talking to when I started saying how I could see our world dissolving into a dystopian state somewhere in the near future and definitely when I proceeded to go into details.  Too dark for an après-ski themed party?  Woops.

Speaking of books that everyone loves, you should read Arcadia, which has gotten rave reviews from pretty much every publication worth caring about.  It is a beautifully written book that follows a boy who grows up in an imperfect and troubled, yet emotionally rich hippie commune in western New York State in the 60s and 70s.  The author, Lauren Groff, brings the decaying mansion, Arcadia House, around which the commune is centered, to life and thoughtfully examines a tragic and hopeful utopian dream from its origin through its heyday and beyond.  I dare you to Google this book and find a bad review.

And the book video of the week, of a much different flavor than the one for White Girl Problems, is hands down, this one for Heaven Is Here by Stephanie Nielson.  I may be biased because my company is publishing this memoir and it’s the first book that I have helped see from acquisition to bound book, but try to watch this video and tell me you’re not moved. Book comes out in stores April 3, but you can preorder ASAP.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Where in the world...

With no post last weekend, I am sure you have been wondering where in the world everyone has been.

Grammy was in the Dominican Republic for a week with Grampy.  Just a week because one year they went to the Dominican Republic for two weeks and Grammy said that was “just too long.”  (I know…)  You would think the place would feel me more like home to her given that they go to the same resort every year, but that is neither here nor there.  They got back Wednesday and I haven’t heard a peep about the trip yet.  I don’t call them anymore because they are never home and my voicemails seem to have a mysterious way of going missing.  (“No, sweetie, there were no messages from you on the machine.”)  Don’t get me started on the cell phones.  So, Grammy, if you are reading this (and you better be), call your favorite grandchild.

RKsoPitted has been busy with schoolwork, or so he says.  He is getting a degree in applied economics from John Hopkins (D.C. campus), while still working at UBS.  Don’t ask me what “applied economics” means or what he does at UBS.  But, if you ask him and he tells you, then explain it to me.  I do know that RKsoPitted got a 4.0 last semester.   I know this because he emailed me a PDF of his report card, with the message: I'm coming for your fridge space! RPK will rise from the ashes to dominate yet again.” He has always been a little touchy about the amount of space my accomplishments and (pretty) face has taken up on my parent’s refrigerator door.  I didn’t point out to him at the time that there was only one grade on said 4.0 report card for the one class that he took.  Let’s see what happens this semester with two classes on the schedule.  RKsoPitted will be making an appearance in NYC this month.  So, hide ya kids, hide ya wife…

My cousin, Samantha transferred to the University of Delaware this semester.  I am very proud of her and looking forward to visiting her soon so that I can pretend that I am still in college.  When I visited her last year at Salve Regina, a few students asked me if I was a freshman.  I wasn’t sure if that was insulting or not.

My cousin, Paul just bought a condo in Atlanta.  His bathroom is the size of my apartment.  Don’t really want to talk about him.

Ma has been busy at school.  She is always a few steps away from saving the world—just has a few high school students to straighten out along the way.  She asked me to look over a letter she is sending out to the drama family of her school.  I thought about telling her to take out the part about loving all her drama students and parents, but then I realized she could get away with it.  Because it is true and because people would actually believe her.  So instead, I just deleted a few exclamation points.  I love you mom, and I know you are THAT excited because you are crazy, but no one can get away with more than an exclamation point here and there.

No idea where my dad has been.  Not answering my calls.  (Is there a theme here?)  My dad generously offered to help me with a financial matter a little while ago.  (I am being vague so that you don’t know how many peanuts I make per hour at work and also because I am really not qualified to be more specific when it comes to “financial matters” of which I have no knowledge.)  His help and support is extremely appreciated and I know it is not required of him.  Nonetheless, I find it interesting that he goes MIA right at the time when he is supposed to actually do this helping/supporting.  I told the financial advisor at UBS that I needed a little more time before I got back to him as my dad was traveling.  The advisor asked when my dad would be back.  I didn’t know what else to say besides he is always traveling, so I didn’t respond to that email.  Normally, though my dad is very accessible when he is traveling.  I have a better chance of getting him on the phone when he is in Paris, London, Russia, etc. than my mom when she is at her high school in Connecticut.  Apparently not, though when I am calling in regards to financial matters.

A bunch of my friends from the notorious Colgate women’s soccer team are visiting this week for their spring break.  We went on our bar crawl through the upper west side yesterday.  It was great.  See below.



Austin and I walked around the west village last Sunday and eventually ended up near the 9/11-memorial site, which was impressive.  Looking down into the pools was the kind of scary that makes you feel like you have to catch your breath.  I definitely recommend checking out the pools and greater memorial site as it expands.  And thank you to Austin for suggesting we check it out.  We may not be perfect, but we are a good traveling pair.


Where else have I been?  In this video for the book, WHITE GIRL PROBLEMS, which is hilarious (video and book).  Watch: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0iweXv0Rh7Y.  So glad the authors of the book have 676.4K Twitter followers and I decided to wear that H&M sweater the day of the video shoot.

And…(longest post ever, huh?), a truncated (great word) version of the (even) longer piece of creative writing that I wrote for my senior thesis has been included in the online journal of Stone Canoe.  online, here: http://www.stonecanoejournal.org/SC6OnlineIndex.htm.  Click on link and click on my piece.  I would beg you to read but it is kind of long and I actually think the other version, which is twice as long, is better.  So I’ll email it to you and you can read that.  Just kidding.  Kind of.  If you are not bored yet, the piece is about poverty in upstate NY and a pretty extraordinary woman who generously shared her life with me and who I became somewhat enamored with.  She was homeless with three (adorable) kids when we met.  Actually, you should read the truncated version of my piece.  Because of her.  And then let me know if you still want the longer version?

Sunday, February 26, 2012

One fine birthday

My birthday weekend was filled with the finest things life has to offer:

Pretty girls and boots of beers.


Pretty girls and jello shots set in orange and lime peels.


Flowers that I picked out. Love when Austin lets me pick them. Not sure if he appreciates my careful deliberations, though.


Flowers from Caitlin. My favorite kind of arrangement. Caitlin always knows best.


And flowers from mom. She never visits without flowers, love that about her.


Homemade confetti cake. (3D book decorations by Carlton Walker.)


Chocolate souffle with a firecracker candle.



Happy Birthday to moi. Thanks to all my favorites for a lovely weekend. The only thing that was missing was my uncle duncle with a glass of grappa.

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Happy Birthday Bits

I took a vacation from my blog this weekend. What? As you know from my posts, I have a tough life.  This weekend, for example, I had to go to see Spiderman on Broadway with my parents, as well as go out to two fancy dinners with them.  Austin dragged me to a flea market in Brooklyn.  Okay, I dragged him, but it was a difficult trip because I could feel his eyes piercing through the back of my head every time I got close to a rack of clothes. Plus, I was tired from having to think of new ways to try to explain what a “hipster” is to Austin (so that he would stop referring to everyone with glasses as a “hipster”).

Anyway, here I am, blogging on a Wednesday, and it just so happens that this Wednesday, February 22 is the birthday of the one and only, Jessica Bitsack.  I use the word “indescribable” sparingly, because as someone who writes and appreciates reading good writing (not by me, by others, of course), I don’t really believe that the term applies in many cases.  But if I could say that one person (and only person) in my life is indescribable, it would hands down be Jessica Bitsack.

I met Bitsack in August of 2006 during our freshmen year of preseason camp at Colgate.  It wasn’t really love at first sight.  Bitsack was a fitness psycho who enjoyed sprinting 120’s and went to the gym after soccer practice for an extra workout.  As two of the faster and fitter people on the team, we often finished one after the other in fitness tests and conditioning workouts.  For whatever reason (we played the same position, she was good, she was pretty, she could really run, etc.), I had an irrationally strong desire to never finish behind Bitsack.  I don’t remember wanting to beat someone so badly in a running contest since the “mile” race around the property of my elementary school, when I just had to finish ahead of all the boys in my third grade class.  I won’t even get into the actual soccer bit because it is actually kind of pathetic how my heart would drop whenever Bitsack scored during a preseason practice that summer.

I don’t think I ever told Bitsack this (i.e. how I loathed her) and although at the time, I was somewhat convinced that she had showed up at preseason just to torture me, I would bet that Bitsack didn’t even sense this intense rivalry that consumed so much of my own mind.  (In general, I would say that my world and Bitsack’s world often were not one in the same.  But that statement would really need a psychologist to go any further.)  In any case, it is safe to say that I did not imagine at the time that I would one day call Bitsack one of my closest friends, or worse yet, my roommate.  It is definitely safe to say that I did not imagine myself celebrating her personal victories on the soccer field nor her comforting me in my personal tragedies (imagined, real, minor, and somewhat major) off the soccer field.

In celebration of Bitsack’s birthday and her indescribable nature, I would like to remember some of my favorite “Bitsack” moments and qualities—in no particular order, random, just like the birthday gal herself.  Don’t worry, Bits, there are several moments that will remain sealed in Vera’s quote book and a few that will always stay close to my heart, for safekeeping.

  1. How you used to incorrectly use the words “celibacy” and “underprivileged.
  2. When you used to put cartons of soymilk and bottles of soy sauce from our college cafeteria in your backpack to bring home with you.
  3. How you had an entire bin (big enough to fit a large child) filled with coffee materials in our townhouse junior year and I never saw you make a cup.
  4. The way you used to call out our coach’s name in a screechy tone across the soccer field, “Kaaaathhh.”  Her name was Kathy.  No one called her Kath.
  5. When you told us you needed to go on a liquid diet to fit into your formal dress and then proceeded to eat dairy for three weeks straight.  And when Carrie asked you why you buy dresses that are too small for you and you said, “Because I like a challenge.”  And then Carrie said, “You should try going to class.  That’s challenging for you.”
  6. How you used to Clorox the entire apartment, naked.
  7. The night you were sick with one of the plagues or epidemics that you came down with at Colgate (not Swine flu, but the other one) and we went to the hospital and you wouldn’t stop talking about how all the nurses were in a conspiracy theory against you.
  8. The first time you told someone who was giving us a ride downtown to “just put me in the trunk,” even though there was an extra seat in the back of the sedan.
  9. When you were the first person ever to be denied at the door of the Jug for being “too drunk.”
  10. When you used to have “feeding time” and shove food down guys’ throats.
  11. Everyday when you decided what outfit to wear.  And especially the days when it included animal prints.
  12. When you dumped your large Mac laptop on one of our professor’s desk first semester, freshmen year and then rushed into a hurried explanation of how you couldn’t print your paper, but “HERE IT IS.”
  13. The many text messages you sent to let me know that you were waiting for me to return to our apartment at the time, which sometimes truly did frighten me.
  14. How mad the woman behind the sandwich counter got every time you asked, “May I please have some imitation crabmeat?”
  15. When we came home from a night out in Aruba and you insisted on heading straight into the bathtub and not coming out.
  16. “If you don’t have it now, you won’t have it tomorrow.”

Bits, I don’t miss watching you stir several different food groups in a bowl and then eat them all with a spoon.  I don’t miss seeing strands of hair in your mouth.  I don’t miss hearing you yell, “Manchester United” over and over again, when I am trying to fall asleep.  I don’t miss you setting the alarm for 3 a.m. to get up and “do homework.”  I do miss ordering Sushi Blues with you.  I miss the determined look on your face when you do my makeup.  I miss being able to count on you being in three places: your spot in the library, your cafeteria table at Frank, and your bedroom.  I miss being there to hear your daily descriptions of the world, which were always interesting or amusing, and sometimes both.  I miss you being there to literally cheer me on through all my small successes (and just small events), like class readings of stories that I had written.  I miss your delirious laughter and waking up to see thousands of throw pillows propped up on your bed.

Bits, sometimes I wonder what planet you beam in from everyday, but even if I never figure it out, I will be glad that you did beam in at all.  You have made the past five or so years of my life a little more indescribable than they would have been without you.  And I can honestly say that if I had to relive them again, I wouldn’t want to do it without you.

Post your favorite Bitsack moment here (provided that it is appropriate for this blog).


Sunday, February 12, 2012

My Lucky Recap

Where to begin...? The Giants are world champions. Eli is a top-notch quarterback, certainly in Tom Brady's class. (Although, really people, Brady cannot throw AND catch the ball. Thanks for that insight Gisele. Loves.)  Victor Cruz has the best salsa moves around. And my friends could not have been much happier after the Super Bowl last Sunday night:




On Friday, I convinced my mom (no heavy lifting required) to come into the city to shop at one of my favorite stores, LF, which is currently having one of their semi-annual sales.  With the exception of a winter sale and a summer sale, nothing ever goes on sale in this store.  And let’s just say it is a bit of a budget buster.

Last week, when I received the email invitation to attend the exclusive opening of the winter sale, I panicked.  The invitation was for 2 p.m.  My mom (who is a principal in CT) gets out of school at 2:15 p.m.  I called the store on Thursday, hoping I would not have to explain my dilemma, to see how long the exclusive sale—which boasted an extra 10% off everything, which was already marked down by 60%—lasted on Friday.

When the LF employee told me that the store would be closed on Friday for a private event, I may have been a bit to eager to reply, “I KNOW, I GOT THE EMAIL. I’M INVITED.”

Anyway, I found out that the exclusive sale lasted until 8 p.m.  Plenty of time for Mom to get into the city.  And get into the city she did.  There is only one person who has more fun shopping for me than me and it’s definitely not my dad (“Whatever you say, don’t tell me that’s a pair of boots in that box), but most certainly is my mom.

The store was such madness, I really don’t even have the energy to explain it.  #WhiteGirlProblems.  In brief, the checkout line was about 25 yards long and stretched from the cashiers to the front door of the store.  Girls, or rather young women, were trying clothes on all over the store—checking out red, platform shoes; one-shoulder dresses, and leather pants in LF’s few mirrors.  I was hot, faint, sweating, but determined.  As we pushed our way through the store, my mom’s arms served as racks to hold all of the torn sweaters, black dresses, and corduroy pants that I wanted to try on, in an actual fitting room.  (I would try on more sweaters later, while we waited in line to pay.)

About two hours later, I felt very much like I just played an entire soccer match against a Patriot League rival.  In other words, I was very tired.  And my mom needed a drink.  We walked out of the store with two bags, quite literally stuffed with clothes, and off to dinner.  If we had met my dad, he would have asked like he always does, “Did you save me a lot of money?”  I won’t write here how much money we spent because if that didn’t cause my dad to have a heart attack it would cause Austin to pass out.  But, Dad, I will say that the total discount was large.

One of my purchases, coincidentally (or not), Austin's least favorite:



On Saturday, I saw The Vow with Austin and I’m not going to lie, I shed a tear or two.  Channing Tatum’s acting was actually much better than I expected, and he still looked as good as one would expect.  I really like to go the movies lately.  Austin thinks I like to go the movies because that is his thing, but I really just want to be more like my Grammy, who goes to the movies all the time.  One of the best parts about going to the movies is watching the previews.  If you haven’t seen Dane Cook’s skit on going to the movies, watch it now (i.e. see the link at the bottom of post, after you finish reading this blog).  As Dane says, the previews allow everyone to be a critic.  When I go to the movies with my cousin, Sam, I get excited to look toward her after every preview, so we can acknowledge what we think about the movies coming out.  With Sam, this normally just takes an enthusiastic nod of the head or an eye roll or the deadly headshake.  With Austin, we sometimes do thumbs up or thumbs down.  But, mostly I have to poke Austin in the thigh three times when I really like a preview because if I really like it, he probably has no interest in seeing it, which he makes known by refusing to look at me after the preview.  When a preview for a horror movie comes on, though, I swear the kid is right in my face.  I will never understand why people enjoy being scared shitless at the movies, but that is another story, I guess.

On Saturday night, I went to Hoboken with Liz and her friend, Matt.  The evening was shaping up just dandy—I had never been to Hoboken and was looking forward to checking out the scene—until I arrived at a Caribbean inspired bar in Hoboken to find that I did not have my license.  The (very large) bouncer at the door was not in the mood to make any exceptions for this blonde in an oversized sweater (from LF, of course)—who was asked not so long ago if she was old enough to sit in the exit row of the airplane, for which you have to be 16.  Suddenly the cobble stone sidewalk in Hoboken didn’t seem quite so quaint and the pizza places didn’t have such a nice aroma anymore.  And the distance from Hoboken to my apartment on the Upper East Side, current home to my license, seemed to multiply.

As I walked back to the Path train alone, I thought about crying.  But then I remembered that I was wearing mascara.  When I got back to my apartment, Austin was here with our friend (another Matt) and a pile of empty beer bottles, along with two shot glasses.  Austin was wearing one of his fraternity t-shirts from college and he started going on about how I was so lucky to date someone who had inspired not one, but two of the designs for his fraternity’s t-shirts.  One has a large illustration of his disfigured hand on the front—Austin bent one of his pinky fingers playing football years ago and he hasn’t been able to straighten it since.  The other showcases one of his favorite sayings: “Whatchu want?”

When Austin finally (did I just write “finally”?) left the apartment that night, I decided that he was right (in a way).  I was lucky—despite the fact that I had just completed a round trip to Hoboken in stilettos—even if not for the reason that he thought I was.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Happy Birthday to two of my favorite people


Until a couple of years ago, I was the only person I knew who had anything to write down in the “alias” blank of various official documents that we so often sign, giving our lives to away to someone or something in fine print.  (Oh reader, you didn’t think my parents really named me “Kiki,” did you?)  That was until my friend Caitlin’s alter ego, Karen, surfaced.

I could not say for certain when or why Karen showed up, but I think her spirit was born around the time that Caitlin tried to convince a flight attendant to let her off a plane that had already boarded in Nassau, Bahamas and was shortly taking off for New York (see exhibit A below).


When asked by the flight attendant if she was okay and why she wanted to exit the plane, Caitlin said: “Oh yes, I am fine, I just don’t want to leave the Bahamas.”

After the flight attendant explained to Caitlin that because of security reasons, if she left the plane, airport staff would have to inspect all of the luggage onboard, delaying all the passengers who actually did want to leave the Bahamas (crazy people), she quietly took her seat.  My friend Jillian and I were enormously relieved.  One, because people sitting near us on the plane knew that the two of us were with Caitlin and had pieced together what she was up to.  (That would have made for an awkward flight.)  And two, because we had no idea what we would tell my parents when they came to pick us up at Kennedy airport and Caitlin wasn’t there.  But looking back on that day, I am most glad that Caitlin came back with us because if she had not, then Karen may never have risen to power in quite the same way that she did during the second semester of senior year.

So who exactly is Karen?  Karen is the name our friends coined for Caitlin’s alter ego.  Karen is funny without trying to be.  She likes to wear heels and straighten her hair.  She goes with the flow.  Sometimes she buys everyone she is with at 4 a.m. breakfast just because.  She likes vodka and themed parties.  She travels from Boston to New York to spend one night with her friends.  She stays up late.  She is always laughing.  She believes in the why not motto.  She loves to talk and is at ease making friends with strangers.  And she was often the talk of the parties held at the infamous 22 College Street house at Colgate, which became Karen’s beloved second home the spring of her senior year.  She is a funny dancer and a great friend.

But as much crap as we give Caitlin on Sunday mornings for Karen’s adventures the night before, the truth is that the alias doesn’t fall from the tree.  And in this case, that is a good thing.  Sure, Caitlin probably makes a more organized co-worker and a more diligent student than Karen—but I see a lot of Caitlin in Karen and vise versa.  When it comes down to it, they both have bad jokes and stunning blue eyes and they both go out of their way to be nice and make other people happy.  And at the end of the day, I feel lucky to call both my friends.

Happy Birthday to Caitlin/Karen, two of the best people I know.

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Family Sound Bites

It only takes twenty-four hours with my family to gather some quality sound bites.  Without further ado, here are a few. Happy Sunday.


Sitting at the dinner table on Saturday night, my aunt explains to us an “angel reading” that she attended at a friend’s house:

“None of my angels were there.  I just had the standard angels.”

“Oh, what are the standard angels?” I ask.

“Um, Gabriel, Michael, you know the angel names.”


Later that night, watching TV with my parents and grandparents:

“I see double sometimes,” Grammy says.


“So, how many people do you see on the TV right now?” my dad asks.  (There is one skateboarder on the screen.)

“Two,” Grammy says.

(Another skateboarder comes on the screen.)

“What about now?” Dad asks.

“Four.”

(A commercial comes on, with three actors.)

“What about now?”

(And so on and so forth…)


Sunday, in a clothing store with my mom, cousin Sam, Aunt Val, and Grammy:

“Kiki, are you going to buy that hat?” Grammy asks, pointing at the black hat on my head.  “It’s really cute.”

“The hat I am wearing right now?” I ask.

“Yes, I like it a lot.”

“This is my hat, Grammy.  I’ve been wearing it all day.”


Later in the afternoon on Sunday, getting ready to go back into the city.

“Rob, is the chicken almost done?” Mom asks Dad.  Then, turning to me, “I made Austin a roast chicken since he wasn’t here for dinner last night.”

(An entire chicken in the oven for Austin.)

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

For Liam, one year later

One year ago today, the world lost a little boy who was brave and kind beyond his six years.  When I met Liam a few years ago I could tell that he was the kind of person who could make your glass feel half-full, even when it seemed to be three-quarters-empty.  I could tell this because three-quarters is exactly how empty my glass seemed the day I met Liam.  We were both in the overnight pediatric wing of Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center.  You could say we were both in pretty shitty situations.  But still, Liam had this light about him.  And I don’t mean that in a woo-woo way, but just simply that it was obvious that this kid made the place—which you could say was pretty drab—brighter.  People became noticeably happier when they were around Liam.  I always thought Liam made a much better hospital visitor—IV tubes and all trailing behind him—than any of the clowns, musicians, and comedians who passed through the hallways of Memorial Sloan-Kettering.  But I wish he had never had to walk down one of those hallways.

It has been a year since Liam passed and I still have many questions and doubts and a lot of heartache.  In the past year, sad things have happened to other people who I care about—the kind of sad things that can make you wonder how the sun could possibly still rise over certain homes.  I do not know what I believe about religion or faith or fairness anymore.  I definitely do not know why bad things happen to good people.  What I do know is that sometimes good things come out of bad things and that good people do good things even in bad (shitty) situations.  I do not know why some people die young while others live to be old.  But I do know that as long as I am here, I want to live like Liam did, or as his mom Gretchen says, “love like Liam.”  And here is how you can, too:

*Love and protect your siblings and best friends.
*Make sure the people who take care of you (and care about you) know how you feel about them.
*Do not worry about all the reasons why you cannot do something.  Think of something you can do and then do that.  Because you can.
*Make someone else feel better who is having a shitty day, on a day when you, too are having a shitty day.
*Do things that are important and special now, today. Be less concerned with later.
*Go about your day thinking that you could make a new friend at any time in any place. Then, make one.
*Support great causes, great people, eat cookies—and do all three at once, which is what Liam did almost everyday.  (Do not worry, this is the easiest one on the list.  Just go to: http://www.cookiesforkidscancer.org/)
*And of course, if you love something as much as Liam loved scootering, do not let the rules or anything else get in your way.  Just be open to scooter-walking when you absolutely have to.


For more on Liam, see these posts:
http://kikikoro.blogspot.com/2011/02/tips-i-learned-from-liam-plus-few-from.html
http://kikikoro.blogspot.com/2011/01/for-liam.html

And really, go to the Cookies for Kids' Cancer website. Much better than this blog.  And you have cookies, t-shirts, jewelry to buy before Valentine's Day.  Email me for my apartment and office addresses...Love Like Liam's Lemon cookies start shipping on February 6 (http://www.cookiesforkidscancer.org/ProductDetails.asp?ProductCode=LLL).

Sunday, January 22, 2012

G-MEN

A little too distracted by SportsCenter and a lot too excited for the Giants game to post right now.  So I am just saying "hi" to Grammy. (Promise to post later, Grams.) Off to Austin and Steve's neighborhood bar, where everybody knows their names...

Monday, January 16, 2012

Things that do not make sense

Some of the funniest stand-up comedy skits that I have seen have been instances when the comedians have joked about realities in our everyday life that simply do not make sense.  And there is a lot of material.  For instance, where are all the baby pigeons?  There is one comedian who performs regularly at The Comic Strip Live in Manhattan, who often bets the audience that no one will be able to locate a baby pigeon in the city before the show is over.  He also says that pigeons must be like Marines—they leave no wounded warriors—because he has never seen a dead pigeon in New York.

There are many different words that we use—in various situations—for things that do not make sense: “ironic,” “hypocritical,” “tongue-in-cheek,” “strange,” or as my mom sometimes says, “wack.”  Sometimes, it can be annoying or maddening when people are hypocritical.  Like when a friend—who spends 85% of all your conversations with her talking about herself—complains about how self absorbed all her other girl friends are.  But, on a good day, this might make you smile.  Because when you think about things that don’t make sense, sometimes they are just too darn wack not to smile.  Like these things:

*When a guy—who has been arrested for getting into a fight at a bar—criticizes a friend for getting into a fight at a bar that did not end in arrest (“A bar is not the place.”) in front of mutual friends who witnessed the guy’s arrest.

*When your boss tells you (at 5 p.m.) that you should “really go home early tonight,” as he hands you more work to do.

*When someone asks you for advice on whether she should do A or B, and after you tell her to do A, she gives you three reasons that explain why you are wrong and why she should actually do B.

*When it makes people happy to be miserable.

*When a cat survives getting hit by an 18-wheeler.  And when that same one-eyed cat outlives her great, great, great grandchildren.

*When you disconnect the battery of your car every time you turn your car off (and reconnect with a wrench every time you turn it on), in order to save power.

*When someone asks you to do him a favor and you realize that he could have done the task in the time it took him to explain it to you.

*When you pre-game an open bar.

*When you are out to dinner with a dozen or so friends and at the end of the meal, the same few people realize that they do not have any cash and that there is no money on their debit cards.  And those are the same people who planned the dinner and chose the expensive restaurant.

*When a visiting friend (who you gave a key to your apartment to) wakes you up at 5:15 a.m. to buzz him into the apartment.

*When you spend an entire evening dancing, flirting, and making out with a stranger at a bar, and you leave with only her friend’s number.

*When girls wear Uggs with mini-skirts.

*When the innkeeper at the bed and breakfast that you are staying at for the weekend tells you, “I’ve seen blood on the sheets.  I’m not worried about contracting AIDS, though; I’m worried about hepatitis B.”


What doesn’t make sense in your life?